Too Exhausted for “Buttering the Biscuit”?
Yes, “buttering the biscuit” is a euphemism for sex. We have all felt exhausted from time to time, but if it has interfered with your “adult nap time” it’s time to turn over a few pillows.
First check is priorities. What are we doing with the time and energy we do have? Has “fun time” been shifted to a lower rank? If so, ask yourself, Why?
Setting priorities is key.
Having said this, I understand our current season has been nuts and unpredictable, and you may be battling for your health or caring for small children. Bringing an infant home can lessen your desire to do much else besides caring for your baby.
I once had a season of nursing a newborn and chasing a toddler at the same time. After having little hands grab at me all day long, the last thing I looked forward to was having man-hands grab at me at night.
Talk with your spouse about how you’re feeling and come up with creative ideas together to keep each other a priority.
Consider taking long showers together, sleeping in one day a week when he takes care of the kids so you can be rested for nighttime activities, finding times in your week to take in a quick “joust,” streamlining tasks to create more breaks, or idling back on other commitments.
When I was in the season of raising small children, I scheduled in my husband, that is, I let him know when the “hot date” was.
Before I make myself sound better than I was, here’s what that looked like sometimes: “Okay, I’ve got thirty minutes right now; after that your window is closed.” Not the sexiest way to initiate, I suppose—not that I got any complaints—but communicating what times and situations work best for both of you is important.
It’s all about communication.
If you are exhausted—especially too exhausted for “buying Frisbees”—do something about it.
It may be as simple as taking some downtime. Schedule breaks regularly. We all need time to rest and recuperate; take time to do so. Or if making some changes doesn’t seem to help, you may need to see a doctor to get your hormones or thyroid checked or to rule out other health problems. In any case, don’t stand back and let exhaustion damage your marriage. And then go buy those Frisbees!
If we are married we need to make our spouse a priority, and our physical relationship communicates just that.
A couple who “plays” together, stays together.
Sections of this post were taken from The Intimacy You Crave: Straight Talk about Sex and Pancakes by Lucille Williams which brings relatable, real-life stories of everyday women that will challenge and equip you to work toward a greater intimacy that infiltrates every area of your married life. Pick up a copy HERE. You may know someone who’s getting engaged, From Me to We would make a perfect gift. GET a copy HERE.
