Should We Change the Marriage Vows?

I was just thinking. Please bear with me. Just wondering…do you think we should change the marriage vows to something a little less permanent? I mean, forever, until death do us part, in sickness and in health, in good times and in bad, I mean, really, isn’t that a bit extreme? Forever?! I don’t know if I can do that.

The night before my wedding I cried for hours because I was scared. At barely nineteen years of age I was scared that I was making a mistake. I mean, marriage is a big commitment. I hadn’t even gotten a credit card yet or purchased my own car or gone on a girls gone wild trip. I had scarcely experienced life and now I was about to join my life with another, until death do us part. Really? Could I really do that? I seriously didn’t know. And in my disbelief I wept and didn’t sleep. I was in the room of my maid of honor, my soon-to-be sixteen year old sister who was even more confused than I was. As merely a teenager herself she had no advice to offer.

All she had for me was one question…

“Why are you marrying him?”

My answer…

“Because I love him.”

That’s all I had.

“Because I love him.”

That was the only thing I was sure of but was it enough?

Is love enough?

What happens when you don’t feel “in love,” what then?

I don’t know about you, but for me I go back to my wedding vows and I look within. What is it about me that needs changing? Am I appreciating him for the man that he is or am I expecting him to be something that he is not? Am I wanting something that is unreasonable for any man and putting a demand on him which is unfair?

Is love enough?

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.  Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. 

1 Corinthian 13:4-8

Is love enough?

I say yes. After thirty-seven years I say, YES.

If you are struggling in your marriage today, think back on those vows and then ask yourself a few questions.

Do you love him/her?

Is it you that you are really unhappy with?

Is there something you need to change?

What can you change in the situation? 

How can you love better?

“Love never fails.” I believe that. Do you?

Thanks for bearing with me. Love well, my friend!

Fondly,

Lu

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