Is the Answer Botox?

My husband said, “Why do you make that face? That looks weird.” Making “the face” I said, “This face?” He said, “Yes, that one.” I’m thinking, “Whatever. Who cares? Weirdo.” But then he said, “It’s causing lines in your upper lip.” Now he had my attention.

Conclusion: Face gone. Who’s the weirdo now?

Aging can be a terrifying process. Each day as a woman—or even a man—looking into the mirror can cause horrifying thoughts as the new lines and imperfections emerge. More drooping and less radiant glowing can take our thoughts to dim doldrums instead of an energetic vibrate blooming spirit of youthful vitality.

I get it.

I fully feel the aging process. I’m a grandma and my grandkids like to pull at my once rosy and vibrant but now somewhat hanging skin commenting on the sagginess. My granddaughter likes to grab at my aging neck and I told her—one time!—”Stop pulling at Grandma’s neck, you’ll give me turkey neck.” Now she regularly pulls at my neck and says, “Turkey neck, turkey neck!” 

Such a fun game.

What is one to do with a turkey neck? Or aging lines or sagging skin?

My husband and I were watching one of our favorite TV shows and there was something hugely different about one of the actresses. She looked funny. It was hard to place what made her look so noticeably different. Then it hit me. She had face work done. Like plastic surgery face work, the kind where moving lips look funny, and the face looks tight. I said something to my husband about it and he noticed it too.

We both talked about how beautiful she had been before the face work. In my opinion the work that had been done did not enhance her beauty but instead diminished her attractiveness. Many performers have succumbed to the same kind of procedures. You know what I’m talking about, we’ve all noticed. The kind where watching someone speak feels painful because of the work done on their lips and the foreheads with no lines and a tight face that looks plastic. The kind of work that says I know I’m 70 but look at me I look 20 again—that kind.

Anything that hides our age and wrinkles and imperfections is A-okay even if it means we no longer can talk normally because our lips are parched and our face is stiff. 

What’s wrong with lines on a face? I mean really? What’s so wrong with age lines? It’s an honor to grow old and proudly demonstrate our years where we loved, cried, held babies, cheered for others, jumped with glee, laughed so hard our face hurt, smiled because our delight poured out of us…that’s what those lines represent. We need a shift in our thinking. Older is still beautiful. I’ve seen many older women who look radiant. Their attractiveness overshadows the lines and wrinkles and natural aging process and their beauty shines through. Beauty trumps age. My great grandmother was round with long gray hair and I remember her as beautiful long into her 90s.

Beauty cannot be defined by wrinkles and sagging skin. Wrinkles and sagging skin are a signal of a life well lived. A life filled with love and laughter and adventure, a life to be proud of, a life to be cherished.

Instead of trying to hide our aging…

I’m making a vow to embrace the aging process and wear happy lines, smile marks, and a turkey neck with pride.

Will you join me? Let’s redefine aging and stand up and shout “Age is beautiful and wrinkles are battle marks of a life well lived.”

“Strength and dignity are her clothing, and she smiles at the future.” – Proverbs 31:25

For more from Lucille Williams on marriage check out her books, From Me to We, and The Intimacy You Crave. Have kids? Order a copy of The Impossible Kid: Parenting a Strong-Willed Child with Love and Grace or Turtle Finds His Talent for ages 2-6. Subscribe to LuSays today for weekly encouragement.