A Message for Moms
“Lord, please give me the strength and wisdom to get through today. Please Lord, I need energy—I’m not asking for extra—just enough to do everything I need to today.” Many days started like that, but on this particular day it was not one of those parenting days, in fact, all was well—superb even.
My day was going so well that I decided to head to my kids’ elementary school, and watch them play on the playground.
Undercover, of course.
I’d park at the far end of the school and watch from the street. I wanted to see how my children interacted when they didn’t know Mom was looking on. I was thrilled with myself that I was being a Mom Detective, a modern day Sherlock Holmes.
Then, I noticed a little boy chasing and throwing down all the little girls. They were dropping like Hulk Hogan would drop Rawdy Roddy Piper.
My mouth open and with a huge gasp, Who is that child’s mother?! Unbelievable!
Unable to look away and zeroing in with a squint: OH NO! THAT’S MY SON! I’m that mother.
I could hardly breathe. Now, trembling and resisting running on the playground—which would have been breaking the rules—I sat in my car completely dumbfounded. On my way home I tuned into You’re the Worst Mother in the World radio station playing in my head. I was defeated, furious, sad, embarrassed…and felt like I couldn’t be any worse of a failure as a mom.
When I get him home I’m going to let him have it!
Wait, wait, wait, wait. Stop! STOP! Turn off the accusing radio station, calm down, stop, stop…and pray.
Pray.
I heard from God.
“After the earthquake came a fire, but the LORD was not in the fire. And after the fire came a gentle whisper.”
-1 Kings 19:12
It was as if God said, “This is your sweet boy. He’s still the same little boy who compliments girls on their dresses and gives away his jackets. Talk to him. Just talk to him.”
“Talk?! I’m going to…”
“Just talk.”
“I feel like the worst mother in the world.”
“I know. But parenting isn’t about you. It’s about your son.”
It wasn’t audible mind you, I’m a little crazy, but not that crazy. Nonetheless, God did speak to me that day, and that’s what I heard.
I waited until the end of the school day—although, I was tempted to pull him out early.
Once Tim was home, I sat him down.
“Sweetheart, Mom watched you on the playground today, and I saw you throwing down all the girls. Why? Why would you do that?”
“It’s a fun game, Mom. We were playing a game. Like I play with Monica.”
And that’s when the lights went on. There was a lot of wrestling in our home when the kids were growing up. My kids wrestled with dad, they wrestled with each other. Monica was older than Tim, and bigger. And she was really rough with him. We hadn’t taught him that all girls were not as tough as big sister.
The radio station began playing again You’re the Worst Mother in the World.
Stop! Stop it! Focus. This isn’t about you.
I talked with Tim about appropriate play and how not all girls are like his sister. And that was it. It never happened again—I know, because I checked. Sherlock Holmes, remember?
We can get so caught up in being the perfect Mom that we put undo stress and pressure on ourselves. Some days are chaotic and wild and loud. We need to quiet the noise and listen for God.
Sometimes you just need to drop to your knees and bury your head in a seat cushion and cry out to God.
God is there. He is waiting. He will give you guidance and wisdom.
Today, Tim is a pastor and one of the best dads I know.
Be encouraged Mom, you’re doing the hardest and most important job on earth.
Don’t focus on the bumps along the way.
Focus on the treasure at the end of your mom journey.
Focus on the treasures along the way.
Your calling was appointed and ordained by God.
Her children rise up and bless her; her husband also, and he praises her, saying: “Many daughters have done nobly, but you excel them all.” Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the LORD, she shall be praised.”
-Proverbs 31:28-30
March on, faithful one, march on! Your rewards await.
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