5 Points to a Hero Husband

As I sit outside of our hotel room—while away with my husband—I can hear the family sharing a patio with us. Their door is open and I can’t help but hear their words. I am ever compelled to write. It is not often you get to peek in on other families like a fly on the wall.

The writer in me is over-the-top excited!

Please join me in my voyeurism…

They are packing up to leave. Mom is barking orders.

“Brush your teeth.”

“You can’t wear your bathing suit.”

“It doesn’t matter, you can’t….” What did she say next? I couldn’t quite hear, bummer!

“Hurry up!” That one was clear.

“Get a suitcase and start wheeling it out there. Let’s go!”

It sounds like she is talking to five-year-old children. As I glance over I realize the kids are teenagers.

And what’s more, one of the recipients of her barked orders is her husband. Holy molasses!

So sad, she speaks to her husband as if he were one of the kids!

Then I hear her sarcastically say, “I wouldn’t want to ruin your day,” as her husband was cleaning the boogey boards outside.

This Trailblazer Woman is clearly leading the pack-up-and-go-home CHARGE. And her husband? He didn’t say much at all, but followed all her orders. Geez! Grow a beard or something!

Perhaps he likes it this way. Maybe? Perhaps she likes being the one in charge. I don’t know?

Maybe she’d love it if hubby would take the lead, and then she could, I don’t know? uh, sit back and take in some beautiful California beach sun. Maybe?

What would happen if she fell back and didn’t trail-blaze? What would happen if he stood up and told her to stop barking orders? There is no doubt in my mind that’s what my husband would do given that situation. And just to be clear, I know I’ve had days that were not my finest moments and have had to be called out by hubby-ho. Once maybe. Okay, twice, but not more than that! And I’m sticking with twice. *fingers crossed behind my back 

Words like “Yes, ma’am!” or “Hey, chill,” let me know I’m about to be called out if I don’t make an about face immediately. On my good days an apology ensues. But I hardly ever have to apologize. *fingers crossed behind my back again

Keeping it real, as I reflect, I become more and more grateful for a man who stands up and leads. It is easy to follow a man like my husband. A man who leads with compassion, grace, and consideration of others. A man who loves unconditionally, who takes on burdens—which I don’t even know about much of the time.

But what if my husband sat back and relinquished the reins of looking out for his family? What would I do? How would I react? Would I step up and lead the charge? Would you? I’m thankful I haven’t had to face that decision. To that point, those leadership qualities are what drew me to him in the first place. I like men who are…well…men.

Men who don’t stand up, as in…

Men who surrender their own opinions to conform to their wives.

Men who make poor decisions in an attempt to not rock the boat.

Men who do not take a stand for their children when they are being mistreated.

What’s a wife to do?

As a wife, how can we encourage our husband to lead?

5 Points to a Hero Husband

• Step back. If we encourage him to lead and lead without criticism he’ll be more apt to step up.
• Give bossy her walking papers. No one likes to be around anyone who’s a bossy flossy. I mean, do you?
• Praise decisions no matter what the outcome. We all make mistakes and some not so good decisions. Find something to praise and you’ll find he’s more willing to lead the charge.
• Verbalize trust and respect. Ladies, your man needs to know you trust and respect him, and the more you let him know that, the more he’ll be the knight you long for.
• Please don’t treat him like a wimp.Take a minute and muse over that last one.

If you don’t want a wimp, don’t treat him like one.

Back to the family next door, I wonder if she weren’t so bossy would her husband emerge? I wonder if he stood up, would she be less bossy? I wonder if he’s happy? I wonder if the passion has disappeared in their marriage? I wonder…

What do you think?

Fondly,

Lu

Check out “From Me to We” by Lucille Williams and discover how you can stay in love forever. Subscribe to Lu Says today by giving us your email. We promise not to spam you.