10 Relationship Tips to Get the Love You Crave

Marriages have become disposable. People get married with a seeming attitude of, If it doesn’t work out, then I can just get divorced.

Confession time: I was one of those people. When I got married I openly verbalized that “if it doesn’t work out, then I can just get divorced.” Yes, I really said that! And what’s worse, I said it to my dad who was paying for the wedding! Ha!

Explanation time: I was eighteen years old and I was not a Christian.

Flash forward time: Thirty-five years later and I am still married. Disposable marriage? I think NOT. I am ready to go another thirty-five years. Somewhere along my merry little marriage way I learned selflessness. Somehow, [actually it was God!] I learned the ability to put my wants and needs aside for the wants and needs of another. Somehow, I learned that if I could put my needs aside I would find joy in my marriage. Funny how that happens, huh?

It is the “reap what you sow” principle. The more work and attention you put into your marriage the better it gets. And more importantly, the more joy you feel. Any time you see a happy couple, you are looking at a couple who works at their marriage. It doesn’t just happen, it’s intentional and IT’S WORK. A lot of work. A lot of hard work.

I was miserable in my marriage when it was all about “me.” But when I became a Christian and I learned to give up self, that’s when my marriage began to get better and better.

And this is the key to a happy marriage:

The willingness to put the other person first.

Even when you don’t feel like it.

You might be thinking…

What does this look like?

10 Relationship Tips To Get the Love You Crave

• Honor and respect your loved one all day and every day: There are no off days in marriage. Showing kindness, honor, and respect is a continued urgency.
• If something is important to your partner, you make it important to you: If we value our spouse, we value what they value.
• Keep your spouse a priority: Even above the kids. A child centered home, (always putting your children before your spouse) is damaging, not only to the children, but to the parents as well.
• Say Thank you often, even for the “little” things: Thank you, thank you, thank you, we all like to hear those words.
• Be mindful that life is not all about you!: Too focused on self and you’ve got a recipe for a crash. Marriage is about loving another not demanding what you want.
• Make your bedroom the “funnest” room in the house: Needs an explanation? Nah!
• Consider your spouse in your decisions: Marriage requires “we” thinking not “me” thinking.
• Get used to saying, I love you, I’m sorry, Please forgive me: Be ready and willing to be wrong and to express your love and devotion often.
• Forgive, Forgive, Forgive: One could call marriage the Forgiveness Ministry. Any long-term marriage is comprised of two people who are proficient at forgiving.
• Spend time with God every day and pray for your spouse every day: It is through God you will receive the ability to think of your beloved before yourself. It is natural to always think of me, me, me, it is supernatural to consider the needs of another.

It’s time we dispose of disposable marriages. As soon as I didn’t see my marriage as a chance to “get all I wanted,” and realized marriage was about giving and serving that’s when the magic happened.

And it can happen for you, too.

For more marriage tips order a copy of “The Intimacy You Crave: Straight Talk about Sex and Pancakes” or “From Me to We” by Lucille Williams. SUBSCRIBE to LuSays today by putting your email address in the SUBSCRIBE button and get weekly updates. We promise not to spam you! Order a copy of  one of Lucille Williams’ books for the keys to a successful relationship and tools to stay  in love throughout your lifetime.